It is difficult to forgive

Br. MichaelDavide Semeraro

Sometime ago I spoke with a neighbour of mine who has had to face many difficulties in her life and bad things done to her by her relatives. This lady told me that she has forgiven the evil that these people have done to her, that she has re-established the relationships with them but that she cannot forget what happened; she affirms that these experiences helped her to be more aware and to make treasure of them. But her husband pointed out that to forgive as a Christian means to forget what happened. I agree with my neighbour but I feel guilty as a Christian.

R.T.

She absolutely must not feel guilty: to forgive does not mean to forget but to overcome evil with good being conscious that a deeper and more profound good is also into the heart of the people who hurt us. To forget can be dangerous because there is a risk of not learning from difficult and hard experiences of life and one has to keep hoping to become better. As the apostle Paul says we are called to conquer evil with good (Romans 12,21). This does not mean to being naive when facing evil. Our Lord Jesus did not underestimate how difficult the relationship with the persecutors and enemies is. On the contrary he did not minimize it and he was never imprisoned in a logic that blocks the life. Forgiving and being forgiven bring us closer to God but this does not mean to pretend that nothing has happened: it means getting on with courage and determination.